I did not know until today, when I looked it up in Wikipedia, that my disorder actually bears an official name. Arithmomania. It sounds like a fancy term that would make me excel in the study of mathematics. However, that couldn’t be farther from the truth. It is this very act of counting that hinders my sleep. It is not the only culprit of my insomnia because as I have previously expressed, my brain just never shuts down. It is simply another puzzle piece to my sleep deprivation. Many people have nightly routines; practices that help calm them before they drift off into never Neverland. I share in some of these practices. I get in my pajamas, brush my teeth, get my stuffed monkey, fluff my favorite pillow and lie down. This is truly where my pleasant experience ends. When a “normal” and I use the term loosely, person cannot sleep, they clear their minds or go to their happy place and inevitably, sleep will come. Well, not for me. I have even resorted to counting sheep. One would think that my lunacy would actually benefit me in this instance. Wrong again. This is where my overactive, never shutting down, never shutting up brain comes in. I cannot not count the sheep because to me, that would be crazy. However my brain takes it one step further and wanders to other sheep associated thoughts. Such as….why does one even count sheep? It’s not the counting part that stumps me but the sheep part. I mean why not dogs, or cats or my favorite, the spider monkey. Really. What’s not to love about a spider monkey? And then, for some unknown reason, I think of the nursery rhyme, Hey Diddle Diddle. The line “the cow jumped over the moon” hurdles to the forefront of my mind and I picture sheep jumping over the moon which is simply more ridiculous to me than cows jumping over it.
I am unsure of when this compulsion began. I cannot recall it from my childhood so I am left to assume I developed it as an adult. It wasn’t as if I woke up one day and decided it was time to count everything around me. It’s just been there. It has never really bothered me before and I am not totally convinced that it bothers me now. However, the first time I mentioned this to my doctor, he sat back in his chair and simply said, “Interesting”. Then my brain went full throttle. Is that interesting, good or interesting, bad? Does it mean I have finally gone crazy? Does it mean I have been susceptible to crazy all along and it’s finally caught up with me? Do I just have an affinity for numbers? Will it stunt my personal growth? Will it hold me back in any way? I truly do not know. I suppose my real question of the day is this: am I doomed to live a life of seemingly random, useless counting practices or is there a cure for me? Maybe, as I say all the time: it is what it is. Maybe there is no rhyme or reason to it all. Maybe there doesn’t have to be. Maybe there is no harm in it at all. Or maybe, just maybe I am perfectly sane, simply counting my way through this insane world.
I'm 14 years old, and I have a minor case of Arithmomamia. I count tile, window, sidewalks, lines on the highway, car tires, everything! Sometimes, when i'm occupied, I can shut it out. But when im just walking or in a car I start counting!when its time to sleep im pretty good at shutting it out. But sometimes in my dreams I think of myself counting. Its not something I can't deal with. But the compulsion I get to count is sometimes very annoying. Sometimes I don't notice myself doing it, but other times its very compulsive. I often wondered if other people counted like I did. I don't have OCD, like having the compulsion to clean, or organize, but I always need to be on time for everything!
ReplyDeleteHello Brianna, My name is David, im 21 and im from Ireland! I have had this since i can remember i may have a more severe case going through my own numerical system and very silly angles and degrees that dont need to be explained (boring stuff haha) but that doesn't matter! I guess im writing to you just to say that i hope your getting on fine with everything since you found out, it is something that can keep your mind active and always "on it's toes" as they say! If you ever find you have any questions you can reply on this and i'd be more than happy to just talk or answer anything
DeleteHello Brianna, My name is Chris. I am a proud father of 3 children. My oldest girl is 10 and isn't a numbers person yet. She is able to visualize the problem in her head, but doesn't have all the math skills yet to get a solution. I wanted to let you know that this isn't a curse. I am in my late 30's and had "Arithmomania" all my life (they used to not even have a name for it). I am like you, I don't have OCD because I don't have a compulsion of any other kind except for Problem Solving. And I say Problem Solving because it used to be counting for me when I was younger. But after learning as much math, physics, and almost field of engineering possible. What we have, can actually have a purpose or be useful if you can control it "somewhat" . If you are like me, you might just see it in your head. Which means you can visualize it. If you have the visual ability, here is a bit of advice that I wish someone would have told me a long time ago. #!# You are not counting something, you are solving something *## You are only USING the counting process to find a solution. Now, whether it is walking down the street and you are counting steps you take to get there. Then that goes off in your head to how long will it take to get there. Then that gets you into counting seconds and minutes it will take to get there. It is all counting. Almost everything in this world involves some form of math or explanation. Except for emotions, and I am sure people are going to respond with a zillion other things. But the brief point I am trying explain is. Almost everything in this world has a calculation or can be put into an equation of some kind. I use "Almost" loosely. Here is an example: If you ever go out to the beach and look out into the ocean, look for a spot where it appears that the ocean is creating waves. Then watch that wave build and carry itself all the way to the shore... Did you know, that wave has an equation and can be calculated? I didn't... But I learned it when I went to college. I have no use for it now in my life, but I still can calculate it... The point I am trying to make is your brain is going to count because that is a subconscious task your brain does every millisecond whether you know it or not, whether you are asleep or awake, or even if you had a "normal" brain as they say. When you walk towards a wall? Do you walk right into wall and hurt yourself? No. Your brain calculates the distance and your subconscious tells you to stop or alter your path. Our brains are just over sensitive to calculating everything. Learn as much about everything. Even if it is something you are NOT interested in. Because then it is something new. And read history, especially if you think it is boring, because history can NOT be changed, and it has nothing to count or solve. It will help you with being able to shut it off, when you need to. And talk to your parents before you post anything personal about yourself on the internet. You are at a point in your life where you want to know more about yourself. Read Read Read, Learn Learn Learn. I wish I would have had the internet when I was trying to figure out why my brain worked the way it did at your age. Especially when the doctors couldn't give me a reason. Your brain is different than most, so use it to your advantage. And when you have questions about yourself, read about experiences from others, don't try to find a definition or think that there is a cure. Neither exist, I would know, because I have tried it all.
DeleteChris, thank you for your response, it really put things into perspective for me.... I'm 39 yrs old and am just finding out that it has a name or that it's even a thing.... I just thought it was something I did and was ashamed to share due to fear of rejection or being made fun of. Also, I have children to, ages 21 down to 1 and appreciate your advice not to share personal info online.... Ty so much
DeleteGod, I am 15 years old, and I also have this thing. I didn't know it had a name until like a week ago. Chris, thank you really, really much for your message, as it explained many things to me. I... I wonder if a Math career would be good for me, or if it would make the disorder worse. I do wonder.
DeleteHad maths made anything better for you? I mean, by focusing on maths, have you had better experiences with your mental thing? Because I'm afraid of taking up such studies and making it worse.
That is pretty much how I am
DeleteI do this exactly. I don't have OCD or anything, but I'm always counting. Every step... and for some reason, I seem to try to line up my steps with prime numbers and I always have to go through a doorway or down the stairs with my right foot landing on a prime number. I'm not good at math or anything. I have no idea what it was. Is this what it is?
DeleteI am 14 years old and have this same problem but I prefer the numbers 4,16,64,128 and so on. I think mine started serval years ago. I needed all the light switch's down or else it drove me crazy. I only just became fully aware of my condition. I will count the lines on the road or words on signs, and if its an odd number I will keep counting until its even. I have a very good math brain and I've always liked math. I hope you find something that works
DeleteDawson
I count differently, usually in sequences of 6 or 12 and I only count my actions, for example when I walk I count to 6 steps, then to 5... etc... until I hit one. It has no purpose and actually drives me quite nuts- the only time I really don't count is if I am preoccupied. I am trying to find other people or may know what this is, because I am not sure it is arithmomania and I don't really admit to anyone, ever, that I count.
ReplyDeleteI count, but I only count in "true numbers" (the name I made up for them). "True numbers" are 1,3,5,7,10,11 etc. in that order. And I count quite a bit, though not everything. I typically count my steps or certain objects, or justs start randomly counting nothing.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing your experiences with this compulsion. I suppose I have to to a milder extent. Being in mental health I've tried to train myself to ignore my compulsions, but we all know how hard that can be. I've had it for as long as I can remember, although my counting is selective to unique stimuli, and even numbers...mostly 5 and 10. Things have to add up!
ReplyDeleteIf you're finding this is affecting you too much, there certain therapies available (CBT,BT,heck you can do it yourself) that can help with learning how to chose not to response to the compulsion. Although it takes work. Best of luck, hope you're gotten some sleep :).
I've had arithmomania, since as long as I can remember, and obsess over the number '4'. Everything has to be counted in sets of fours, and I have to do things 4 times, touch things 4 times etc. I've always known that I do this, but have never come to terms with it, until I once decided to search the Internet for an explaination. It was only when I began to write down the symptoms that I experience, did I realise how severe it sounds!
ReplyDeleteI love reading about other people's obsessions as it makes me feel not so strange!!!
If you have Instagram msg we have an identical issue... Ig is Zayaluz
DeleteI count everything too, floor tiles, railings, keys on my keyboard as I'm writing this! It's never kept me awake. I also do things like double a number and then double that number then double it again until it gets too complicated to do in my head. I don't really see it as an affliction as I quite enjoy it, but there are times when I can't do something until I've finished counting. I think that unless it impacts on your life in a big way you shouldn't worry about it, or see if you can get a job on Sesame Street as a vampire.
ReplyDeleteI count everything as well. I have had this as long as I can remember. I count my steps, light posts as im going down the street, tiles in my bathroom. I also have a thing for EVEN numbers. I will take one extra step just to walk an even number of steps or do something one more time just to make them even. I never thought anything of it until I asked my mom one day and she stated it wasnt something she did, then i knew it wasnt "normal". My husband makes fun and messes with me about it and I have found that it will actually make me upset if I cant count. and if I lose count I have to restart. Im glad to know im not alone.
ReplyDeleteEver try to count the lines on the highway or the light posts? Quite frustrating but funny as heck now that I'm not doing it..... I also count EVERYTHING! Crazy but I even count ppls appendages and eyes, ears, nose mouth, it's sick but part of me.... Listen, it's gotten me through some really tough times. It can occupy your mind when needed,i was in jail and it worked wonders....
DeleteEver try to count the lines on the highway or the light posts? Quite frustrating but funny as heck now that I'm not doing it..... I also count EVERYTHING! Crazy but I even count ppls appendages and eyes, ears, nose mouth, it's sick but part of me.... Listen, it's gotten me through some really tough times. It can occupy your mind when needed,i was in jail and it worked wonders....
DeleteSounds very similar to my affliction but with one noticeable difference.. If I do something with my left hand, or the left side of my body, it has to be even- specifically 4 times and 5 on the right. So if I pick up a glass with my left I will take 4 sips and I'm compelled to switch to the right and take 5 sips... It's very odd and quite a nuisance! Been with me as long as I can remember though. I never realized this had a name, "arithmomania," I'm glad the original poster brought it up though as it's been a very stimulating read!
DeleteSounds very similar to my affliction but with one noticeable difference.. If I do something with my left hand, or the left side of my body, it has to be even- specifically 4 times and 5 on the right. So if I pick up a glass with my left I will take 4 sips and I'm compelled to switch to the right and take 5 sips... It's very odd and quite a nuisance! Been with me as long as I can remember though. I never realized this had a name, "arithmomania," I'm glad the original poster brought it up though as it's been a very stimulating read!
DeleteSince I an remember I have had the need to count letters. I see a word, count the number of letters forwards, count them backwards, count them foreards in 2s and 3 if possible. I then find the halfway mark and if it is an even amount on both sides and can be symmetrical then I am happy. If it is an odd number then I find the middle letter and hope that is symmetrical - I love the letters M and W!
ReplyDeleteOmg, I thought I was the only person who did this.....
DeleteOmg, I thought I was the only person who did this.....
DeleteThis happens to me since I can remember. I am all about even numbers, and about ratios. Count everything as well, letters as I write, for example. In fact, even this message has an even number of letters, on purpose.
ReplyDelete168
Delete177 including characters, spaces are empty and therefore excluded.
DeleteHello! Well it's good to know "it" has a name. As I count everything has to come out to an even number. Even numbers are my thing. The angles in shapes are my biggest thing. Lines on the road, road signs with in a mile, tiles, lights, cars in a parking lot, list goes on.
ReplyDeleteYeeees! Me too all the way down to features I n ppls faces, limbs, it's crazy! Love finding that there are ppl similar to myself...
DeleteYeeees! Me too all the way down to features I n ppls faces, limbs, it's crazy! Love finding that there are ppl similar to myself...
DeleteHi, I'm Sophie and I do this too.
ReplyDeleteI am always counting. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I'm counting. I count in odd then even numbers. I count in time to other rhythms like my breathing or my heartbeat (or what I imagine it to be). I am like a human metronome; always keeping time. When I go to jog, I try to match my footfalls with my breathing; needless to say that after I've run for a while, that becomes impossible. I count in sets of six, four or any number that my brain fancies. I have a great need for numbers/things to match and it drives me crazy that there are things in life that are just uneven.
The curtains in my bedroom have a geometric pattern on them and they are not matched up. This discontinuity, I find very jarring.
I always have to put my right leg before the left and then count. I know the number of steps from the ground floor to the fourth floor of my local library and I always begin with my right foot so to land on the perfect foot at the summit. I move body parts while I count. I don't just count -for me it's metronomic. When I watch movies with subtitles, I constantly pause to count the number of letters that occur in the words on the screen. I am constantly moving my fingers in time to my internal counting. I always count inwardly.
Like most of the people on this thread, I don't remember the particular emergence of this tic. I just realised one day that I count. It's not disruptive in any way; just awfully annoying sometimes. But hey, think of how much I'll be the star of the party I could randomly start telling my friends how many letters were in that sentence they just spoke or how many letters are printed on the box of Coco Pops they are holding. No? Yeah, not much of a star, lol.
In my case, I also have an impeccable recollection. I remember so much and in such detail from so long ago, it's incredible. I never forget anything. I like to joke and say my hindsight truly is 20/20 figuratively and literally. I have a sneaking suspicion that I'm a hidden genius; something of a phenomenon. One day all my quirks will come together in one massive bang of genius and turn the world-scape right side up! Until then, COUNT AWAY!! :D
Thank you for writing this. I too have a slight case of Arithmomania. I also just found out it has a name about an hour ago. I count tiles, windows, sidewalks, lines on the highway, and the dashes the numbers are made of on digital clocks. I really thought I was the only person like this.
ReplyDeleteI count stairs. I don't really count steps that I take from point A to point B, but I count the number of stairs I walk up/down. I don't have the urge to count anything else really.
ReplyDeleteAny place that I've been to at least a couple of times that has steps I need to take, I know how many steps there are. Even though I know how many steps there are, I still count them.
At home, I walk up and down the stairs multiple times a day. I know there are 17 stairs, but I always count them. If I go one step at a time, I count by 1s. If I go two steps at a time, I count by 2s.
I probably visit my mom's place once a month and I know how many steps you go down to the basement (16) and how many steps that lead upstairs (17).
My daughter's school, the stairs closest to her class, I've been up/down them a couple of times, but I know how many steps (21).
My wife pokes fun at me that I can tell her how many steps are at places we go. Oh well, everyone has some sort of OCD they live with. Mine happens to be mild. I can't recall counting stairs pre high-school, so I'm guessing it started up around my mid-teenage years.
Hi this is so interesting and also reassuring that I am not in my own. I used to count on my fingers as a young child, over and over. Then when I was 16 I took a touch typing course. My number counting and touching wood which is more OCD turned into letter formations ! counting letters from words and also typing out the word in different patterns using my touch type imaginary keyboard that is in my head !! and breaking the word into uppercase and lower case patterns, spelling the word out backwards and so on.... until I had done all the possible sequences. It is quite annoying ! But I live with it... Just nice to know there others out there... Keep smiling people
ReplyDeleteHello
ReplyDeleteI'm Philip from England and I've had a similar thing for as long as I can remember. I follow the tiles round my bathroom in a zigzag route, counting them as I go, then if they come to a divisible number, say 42, I will divide them up into six lots of seven, or two lots of twenty one and so on. I count cupboard doors in the kitchen, following the outsides in a route just without covering the same track, I count rows of bricks on a house, always finding whether they are divisible by any number, I will see a word then see how many strokes it needs to complete each letter, again finding if it is divisible by any number, like the actual word "divisible" would be uninteresting as it comes to 13......it goes on and on, I also read and count the lettering on road signs as I drive along, again finding if the figure is divisible in any way, and sorting letters into groups......all this can become dangerous when driving through a congested area!!
I have found that I do all of this at times when I ought to be thinking about something else, and I consciously or unconsciously start to count, merely delaying what I ought to be doing, or concentrating on.
My mother died at age 98 and it was only in the latter stages of her life that she revealed that she was the same, and now one of my sons has said that he does similar things! My sister also revealed that she was the same!
I have no answer to it, and have never mentioned it to a doctor, as yet, for it doesn't worry me at all.......I think!
I'm 56 and always thought I was a bit odd, I count in my head all the components of everything, for example a window and it's casing etc, all the parts...a door would be counted with hinges and the parts. Everything has to come to a rounded number, like 10, 20, 30 etc. I am thrilled to know I am not alone and there is a name for such.
ReplyDeleteI am so glad I found this post! As like many of you above, I have had this struggle for years now. I'm 23 and for some reason I have tendencies to count in even numbers usually counting corners or sides of anything that has 'edges' be it straight or curvy so for example; A window has four sides so I will say in my head '2, 4' even though I know how many sides they have...Even more so I will count the corners/angles like so; '2,4,6,8' but I won't just do it once I will do it 4 times as 4 is the number I'm obsessed with when in my 'counting mode' and sometimes even 8 times!! It drives me round the bed as I will count windows, tiles, cupboards, signs you name it!! Anything and everything with any kind of edge I will count over and over! Some of the time I won't notice I'm doing it, but when I do notice I'm doing it...it doesn't stop me it seems to make me worse if I'm honest...So relieved I'm not alone and apparently NOT going crazy! :D
ReplyDeleteHI All,
ReplyDeleteI thought it was just me! I am so pleased I have fellow counters. Mine is constant and gets much worse when I am stressed. I have a compulsion to turn letters into numbers, then find the average number, mean, mode, etc.
e.g. If I look at my name Jenny: I turn it into 10,5,14,14,25. I then remove the 14s as these cancel each other out, leaving me with 40, so can change this to T x 2 or 4 x J, 8 x E, 20 x B, etc. I am worst when driving especially with number plates, where I translate the numbers into letters and add the letters, some have so many equations, I can make one number plate last a full journey, or when in meetings if there is literature on the walls to read I really lose track of the conversation. It drives me crazy when trying to sleep. If numbers really don't add up correctly, I add 'You Know, or 'So do I'. I have no clue where this came from but have done since I can remember, and if the letters still do not add up, I adjust these to 7 and 5 as the number of letters in the sequence. My brain is ok for me to do this for some reason and I have never brought in other words or phrases that could compensate. I thought I was bizarre, which I am, but pleased to have safety in numbers with you lot.
Please note; I am fine with the volume on the TV being at 17! Q is a good letter and a prime. It drives my husband crazy if it is not on an even number, as I suspect it does some of you? :)
Does anyone else bring in letters?
Jen
Thats me...i also count in sequence of 3,5 and seven. I look for pairs..as long as the pairs match i keep on trying until i cant match them. Then i give up and it annoys me for a few minutes then i forget about it. Does this condition lead to depression or make you an obsessed person? I did not know this condition had a name..i just discovered it yesterday. I am married since 10 years and i am very jealous of my husband. I am always accusing him of cheating on me and i imagine all sorts of scenario in my head. Is that jealousy linked to this arithmomania?
ReplyDeleteThis happens to me ever since I can remember and favorite number is 3. I have very strong affinity to count characters such as subtitles in a movie. I don’t mind that they remain briefly on screen and that the movie can last for hours. Subtitles can be turned off but I actually prefer having it on.
ReplyDeleteThe counting does not need anything physical or of substance, even music can trigger it. A song or a piece of a song that gets stuck in your head and end up counting the notes over and over again.
When I see a word, result of the count is already there like an attachment. It is likely that I’ve counted characters of that particular word many times before and simply remember it.
To put another way, the count itself is not exactly a number. This is particularly true with short or easy words or even clusters of them. If it is a complicated/long/unfamiliar word, I actually have to count it which is fast but not immediate. However, ‘For example’ is 10 characters and there is no need to count because the knowledge is present and available. ‘For example,’ is 11 characters, I always include punctuation.
Mistakes: I’m 47 year-old professional and don’t remember when I started counting. However, even though I’m very good at counting, I sometimes make mistakes, or so I thought. I recently realized that they are not actual mistakes! My mind adds or subtracts from each count and changes the result of an individual count. Not sure why I choose to do this because the “mistakes” can be annoying and/or frustrating. One way to neutralize this is counting a sentence over and over and faster and faster, in a loop, until the mistake is revealed and correction becomes possible. Until that moment, mistake remains hidden and once corrected, I can rest easier albeit briefly.
I only have just found the word arithmomania tonight, sleep is the worst part for me too now, the old trick of focusing on your breathing triggers it all again and i cant stop counting all night. 4 and 8 for counting/walking anything divisible by 5 or two of the same numbers for volumes im happy with. tried to have quite a handle of it from younger years, learnt to do pretend steps or actions to try and even it out but sleep remains elusive and i get weeks of insonmia every month or so, any tricks that someone may of picked up along the way would be grand
ReplyDeleteI do this as well but it can only be even numbers. Every action has to be even or it's just stressful. I usually go to eight then repeat four times, then I'll do that x 4 so it can be perfectly even. But it's mostly with breathing or twisting fingers or ripping my gums out. I'm a 14 year old female and I think it started around when I was in fourth grade and my Grandmother talked about how she used to count the stoplight until it got to a even number. The next day at school and was running down a hill and whacked my head against a metal bar. Then, I ran up the hill and did it again. Ever since then it's just gotten worse and worse and way more stressful. I want to get rid of it, but it's really hard to try especially when you're counting every breath you take. Any tips?
ReplyDeleteDear unknown,
DeleteI find now, years later. Although so much better, I still find myself counting in 3's! Have you ever tried yoga or meditation? Breathing exercises may help you but it will take time and lots of it. Being OCD, especially when counting, staying quiet and tuning the world out is a very distracting place for people like us! Know that everything is manageable and controllable. This is not some irreversible disease that makes us weird or disabled. It just makes us a little different. And I think that's what makes us perfectly imperfect. Its what makes us, us and thats a good thing. All my best, Jenn6
I just wanted to say to all of you, Thank You for writing! For writing your stories, your feelings and your emotions! I haven't been on here in so long, not since my parents died. My passion for writing has dimmed and I have been struggling to find my voice again. I never knew grief could be this hard. Thank you again to all my counter friends. You are all perfect in my eyes. Love Jenny
ReplyDelete